August 7, 2005 Des Moines

TEXT:  Matthew 14:22-33

 

The Step

 

          “Go on; get out of here!” Jesus seems to tell the disciples.  “Y’all go on by yourself.  I’ll catch up with you later.”  Now, how Jesus was going to catch up with them on the other side of the sea no one seems to have considered.  But given the tone that sounds to have been in his voice, maybe no one wanted to risk a question.  Obediently, they climbed into the boat and set sail.  Alone. 

I don’t know why Jesus sent the disciples away by themselves.  It could have been that he had simply reached his social capacity – his limit of presence, even the presence of his friends – and needed some time alone.  I know that feeling.  I was tempted once, during a long road trip with a colleague for whom silence represented social and  conversational failure, to roll down the window and stick my head into the rushing wind just to have some time alone. 

          More likely, it wasn’t merely the press of people, but their pressing needs that had spiritually depleted Jesus, and he needed some time in prayer. 

          But it could, just as well, have been strategic.  All good parents, teachers, managers and mentors know that they can’t hover over their children or students forever – shielding, whispering the right answers in their ear.  At some point learners must flex their own skills, listen for their own intuition, test their own training, resourcefulness, and resilience.  Knowing that he wouldn’t always be around, perhaps Jesus felt like it was time the disciples tasted life on their own, and tested their metal along the way. 

Who knows?  Maybe it was all of the above.  Whatever the reason, Matthew describes the moment rather bluntly:

Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead to the other side, while he dismissed the crowds. And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up the mountain by himself to pray.

So the disciples set sail, but it doesn’t go well.  Darkness has fallen, and the waves have risen – a miserable combination.  Sailing blindly in a sea-slammed boat, with what at least feels like the imminent possibility of being thrown overboard.  And my guess is that we have some experience with that.  Knowing that “the sea” is a common biblical symbol of chaos – for all that stands as the very antithesis of God’s creative intent – most of us don’t have to think very hard to recall a time when chaos was having its way with us…

Ø     When your marriage begins to unravel. 

Ø     When your kids rain a blowing hurricane of bad decisions and frightening consequences. 

Ø     When grief swells the very waves of life into your soul. 

Ø     When the job that put the food on your table crumbles beneath your feet. 

But the truth is, it’s never far away.  We aren’t always mindful of the fact that we generally live our lives sailing just along the surface of chaos.  By all accounts, most of the time we experience sunny skies and smooth sailing.  But all the while, just below our feet, the sea is gripping the keel, and has a way of breaking out of its tranquility suddenly and frequently enough – slamming its waves into the frame of our lives – to remind us of just how precarious are our days. 

It is, according to Matthew, deep in the night when the waves become the most savage – during the fourth watch of the night, by Roman counting; 3:00 – 6:00 a.m.  I am familiar with that space in the night – roughly corresponding, as it does, to my own rather routine periods of chaos.  I don’t sleep well throughout the fourth watch.  I hit the pillow like a stone at bedtime, and sleep restfully for the first several hours.  But along about 3 a.m., something restless changes.  I don’t know if my mind shifts a gear and begins to prematurely wrestle with the complexities of the coming day, or to rehash yesterday’s unfinished business that will greet me in this new one yet to dawn.  I don’t know if my body just gets fidgety, or simply determines it has been horizontal long enough.  But as often as not, the alarm is irrelevant; by that time I’ve long since wearied of tossing and turning and gotten up on my own. 

The fourth watch; stormy seas; choppy waves.  And edgy, anxious, irrational and sometimes understandable fear.  And in the midst of it, the disciples begin to panic.  It is a telling juxtaposition if think about it a minute:  the disciples are becoming collectively unraveled, while Jesus is getting himself to together.  The disciples are feeding each others’ hysteria rather than finding, together, a shared and greater strength.  Jesus, meanwhile, has settled himself into prayer. 

And in the spirit and strength of that prayer, he comes across the chaos to help.  What happens next is a virtual symphony of echoes from other biblical stories – intended by Matthew or not, I can’t say; but resonating, nonetheless.  Like those who would later visit the empty tomb, for example, the disciples did not recognize, at first, the Lord they had come to love, thinking him a ghost – or worse.  But meeting their eyes, Jesus reassured them, saying “Don’t be afraid; it is I.”  Except that way of translating hides the power of the words, and the echoing story behind them. 

Remember in the book of Exodus, when Moses, while tending the sheep, sees a burning bush and turns aside to examine it?  The voice that meets him from the flames says, “Don’t be afraid.  I am the Lord.  I have seen the distress of my people and I have come to help.”  And when Moses asks for the name of this one who speaks, the voice replies, “I am.”  That is the very phrase inside our story this morning.  When the disciples see this mysterious figure, he replies something very much like, “I have seen your distress and I have come to help.”  But the self identification is exactly the same as in Exodus.  “Don’t be afraid,” Jesus comforts them, “I am,” with all the divine presence and power that name commands.

And then comes Peter’s mind-blowing profession of faith.  Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat, started walking on the water, and came toward Jesus.

What could he have been thinking!?  No one in his right mind would jump over the side of a boat in the midst of stormy seas.  Which is why his action has caused any number of interpreters to suggest that his “right mind” had long since gotten seasick.  One interpreter even goes so far as to hear something sinister in the way Peter frames the question – “Lord, if it is you, command…” bearing too much resemblance to Satan’s testing of Jesus in the wilderness:  “If you are the son of God…”

So, has Peter lost his mind?  Has his impetuous nature once again gotten the best of him?  Or has he become the very embodiment of Satan?

I sure don’t think so.  In this, one of his few shining moments, Peter becomes for me something of a hero of faith.  Faith is one of those funny concepts that requires visibility to be real.  Mandatory, in this arena of faith, is a step. 

          Frederick Buechner argues that faith “is better understood as a verb than as a noun, as a process than as a possession.  It is on-again-off-again rather than once-for-all.  Faith is not being sure where you’re going but going anyway.  A journey without maps.” (Wishful Thinking p. 25)

That was certainly true when Abram was called by God in the 12th chapter of Genesis to go to a new and distant land. All he was given, in exchange for giving up all that he had known and all he had done, was the rather vague assurance that God would lead him.  There was no stated destination, there was no map; nothing.  Just, “start out, and I’ll tell you which way to go.”  Moses faced into something of the same.  When the voice from the burning bush told him to go before Pharaoh, win release of the Israelites, and lead them to a promised land, Moses asked how he could know that he was really speaking to God, and that God’s promises were actually true.  The voice rather unreassuringly replied, “when you have brought the people out of Egypt, you shall worship God on this mountain.”  In other words, when it happens you will know I was telling the truth. 

          Faith, scripture elsewhere teaches us, is “the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”  Against all common sense, but with a conviction of things not seen, Peter actually gave serious consideration to leaving the relative security of the boat and risking the stormy sea – and then took the step.  Admittedly, he didn’t get very far.  Jesus had to step in like a kind of oceanic AAA waveside assistance representative and pull Peter out of the drink.  But his subsequent bath doesn’t diminish my amazement that he did it in the first place.  It wasn’t  until he allowed his common sense to sink him that he sank.

          Dietrich Bonhoeffer, that courageous theologian martyred at the hands of Hitler’s Nazis, once observed about this story, “The road to faith passes through obedience to the call of Jesus.  Unless a definite step is demanded, the call vanishes into thin air, and if people imagine that they can follow Jesus without taking this step, they are deluding themselves like fanatics.  …Faith is only real where there is obedience, never without it, and faith only becomes faith in the act of obedience” (The Cost of Discipleship pp. 53-60)

Faith requires a step, and Peter managed to take it.  Alone among the 12, Peter seems to be the only one in whom begins to glimmer the realization that disciples are called to do the things that Jesus did.  A couple of chapters back, Jesus had summoned the twelve and given them “authority over unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to cure every disease and every sickness.”   Perhaps Peter is finally beginning to take his commission seriously.  Now, maybe this is an odd moment to try and take the idea of imitation literally, but better now than never. 

And isn’t it always in the midst of chaos that Jesus desperately needs imitating disciples?  Isn’t it precisely in the midst of storms that Christ needs a steadying witness?  That Peter eventually got “cold feet” – in more ways than one – doesn’t negate his initial response.   Jesus doesn’t rebuke him for getting out of the boat, but for losing his focus after he did; for listening more to the so called “realities” and complexities swirling and roiling around him than to the one who was holding his hand.

          “If you ask me to,” Peter tells the Lord he has come to trust, “I will.” Maybe that is the point of all this preaching:  in the chaos of our days, in the tumultuous messiness of our ministry, answering Christ’s call, following where he leads; faithfully, adventurously stepping where he empowers us to go – wind, waves, water and all.